Gay London clubs bars sex: map, calendar/diary, reviews, news from DISCODAMAGED

NUDITY AT UNION 2 - FRI 13 APR

After their banging foam party on Sunday Nudity's regular night's back tonight.  Read on for the lowdown...

DD REVIEW: RUPERT STREET TOILET

Rupert Street.  Not a bad bar for meeting mates but the toilets have always been a disgrace. Sometimes a good disgraceful, but generally a pretty make sure you've had your Tetanus jab before heading down there to be perved upon by an array of out of towners disgrace.

"Continue reading" to find out what we found down there...

LA DEMENCE CRUISE 2011 AND 2012 REVIEW

The La Demence cruise 2011 is over and the 2012 cruise is taking bookings. Prices are pretty much the same this year, except they say there will be no last minute discounts. Click the headline for the 2011 review by team damaged and watch the video for an idea of what the ship, the rooms, the parties, the restaurant and the shows were like.

DD REVIEW: BAR WOTEVER'S XMAS FAYRE

We're used to punters setting out their stalls at the RVT via the medium of dance but last Saturday we swung by and found something rather different - Bar Wotever's Xmas Fayre. We found folks selling a whole manner of stuff from crockery to fetish crotchwear. 

Filka (pictured with her latest ad to tempt folks in) is the force behind Wotever (Tuesday's their regular night at the RVT) and was a welcome host to a great idea on what's normally one of the busiest shopping days of the year - tho the weather and transport meltdown made for a quieter affair with mince pies providing welcome sustenance. 

Meanwhile, just around the corner the guys in the bike shop were also having a quiet day. They produced the snowman (right) - a mighty erection that we reckon should be cast in brass and made the central fountain in the new Vauxhall Pleasure Gardens. Petition and contributions to Lambeth Council coming soon.

DD REVIEW: BRIGHTON PRIDE

Brighton Pride.  Beats the pants of the competition and this year they did it again. Here are some observations of some of the darker more comedic bits of it all - and by no way representative of the real Brighton and her lovely people.

DD REVIEW: MOUSTACHE BAR

The moustache bar in Dalston. Fontyn (of Nuke Them All) was playing here tonight and I was really keen to hear a bit of his electrodisco goodness. He didn't disappoint! Moustache is a tiny basement bar bathed in laser light, usually free to get in and the walls are plastered with pictures of moustaches.. proper dalston crowd who are really friendly, impossible not to meet a few on a trip to the loo. It's a bit expensive for what it is, £4 for a bottle of beer. And then we headed to Dalston Superstore at around 12:30AM.
Find it:
The Moustache Bar, 58 Stoke Newington Road, London, N16 7XB
Web: http://www.myspace.com/moustachebar

DD REVIEW: THE HORATIA

We began around 9PM at newish disco-pub The Horatia in Holloway Road, which is owned by the same people who run the ever popular Horse and Groom in Shoreditch. It's a large, lovely bar with enormous windows overlooking the unglamourous Holloway road, with loads of comfy furniture, candles and a spacious dancefloor in back. While not terribly busy at this early hour there were lots of colourful characters, big hair, 80s glam and tattooed freaks. The tunes were an eclectic mix of tech-house, progressive and even a bit of disco.. Ashley Beedle/Darkstar were due to play later but we left around 11:30 to head to... The moustache bar in dalston.

Details
The Horatia, 98-102 Holloway Road, London, N7 8JE
Web: http://www.facebook.com/group.php?v=info&ref=search&gid=222600156311
Capacity: 400

DD REVIEW: DALSTON SUPERSTORE

And then we headed to Dalston Superstore at around 12:30AM. I love this place. When we arrived the queue was not long but it was strictly one-in-one-out as inside was heaving. 20 minutes and £5 later, we were in and the atmosphere was kickin'. It was Homoelectric tonight with more discolated thunk from Luke Unabomber and Jamie Bull in the Basement.. what fun! the mirror ball was spinning, the laser was panning and the DJ booth was glowing. Everyone was loving it and people were dancing on the benches, booths and tables at the sides as usual. Upstairs it was the usual chatty atmosphere and frolicks. DS is now open until 4AM on the weekends, but at around 2:30AM it was time to hit my favourite east end bar, the joiners arms.
Find it
Gay club Dalston Superstore, 177 Kingsland High Street, E8 2PB

DD REVIEW: JOINERS ARMS

As usual on a Saturday (most nights these days) there was an absolutely massive queue.. so we spent the 20 minute wait chatting with a random group of fun Norwegian people who had heard about the place and were coming for the first time. Inside it was totally heaving, the bar was a mess and the Norwegians were perplexed at how this was supposed to be fun.. well I don't mind, I just love the atmosphere there and what a random mix of wild people. Tons of fashion students, various partiers converging from other nearby bars, lots of women and the occasional straight boy in awe of the place.

DD REVIEW: ONYX, FITLADZ

We were bored at a couple of visits recently to Onyx and Fitladz as the scene was having one of those inexplicable quiet phases - by phases we mean gay  mans attention phase which equals one visit. Click the headline to read what we found in the Vauxhall Gay Strip.

SLAGS STILL PUTTING OUT

Belated birthday greetings are in order folks.  Would you believe that Dame Edna and the South London Action Girls Society has been at it for a decade plus - some might say a a generation if you get the metaphor;) Folklore says it was only out of politeness that Jonathon Paul Hellyer stepped aside to allow the first live TV broadcast to be the Queen's Coronation. Edna wouldn't have worried about balancing her crown as it's undisputed.

Anyways, there ain't anything quite like what that mind, voice and heckler demolishing demon brings to the chill out.  'Chill out' might seem like an odd name when you walk into a cross between a full on rave and a Nuremberg rally where the chanting of Edna gives way only to high energy "very gay" music.  Perhaps the name's more apt to the effect. As reliable as the Shipping Forecast but as unpredictable as a Bank Holiday tummy (Carpenters song excl.), most would say that if you wanted to see London at its best, SLAGS under the stewardship of the this lot of miscreants is a must.

By last weeks reckoning Jonathon is still on bloody good form, Andy Almighty, Simon le Vans, Sean Sirrs and Co are still forcing folks to dance till the last tube/ call in sick and the floor has somehow not collapsed. 

Long may folks drive by to find the SLAGS outside in all weathers... topless.. with the High Priestess of Chill Out in session to a backing track of Urban Unrepentant Gay.

DD REVIEW: DALSTON SUPERSTORE

At the end of a 24-hour bender you better hope the club is gonna perk you up, luckily Dalston Superstore did just that. It had been a friend's birthday and, after Friday and Saturday day's fun, we were flagging in a big way. Click the headline for more.

DD REVIEW: DAVID HOYLE AND WRESTLING

It was classic David Hoyle at the RVT Wednesday night followed by wrestling at the Eagle. Taking the Christmas theme and dissecting it we were treated to the real story of... Islam. Fascinating and hilarious stuff that had many in the auditorium fearing a terrorist outrage - though any het up fundamentalist would have assumed that had already happened... judging by the black acrid smoke billowing out the place after baby Jesus was sexually abused and set on fire in his manger in the previous opening act.

CLUB NUDITY – DD REVIEW

Club Nudity is a men only naked dance club with a wobbly screen at one side of the dance floor where people gather for a bit of sex. It takes place under the railway arches in the back half of the Union, so they've got a dance floor / sex area and a bar upstairs with a bit of seating where it's all too easy to bump your head when you stand up. And yes, everybody's naked.

DD REVIEW: SWEATBOX AND SUZIE'S "SEX"

We finally made it along to Sweatbox for Suzie Kruger's new night, the aptly named Sex. Below's a quick review of the venue followed by a review of the night itself. 

DD REVIEW: THE GYM, VAUXHALL

Just a heads-up as we checked out a The Gym in Vauxhall's St George Wharf.  It opened today (Monday) and we gave it the once over.  It's basically a new concept being rolled out where you don't get any frills - it's all automatic, staff are limited etc.  "Continue reading" for more info including a surprise...

DD REVIEW: STAR TREK AT THE IMAX

OK, well aware we may be about to commit social suicide, we went and saw Star Trek at the IMAX last night. We told nobody and snuck in quietly to be greeted by every gay man we'd ever slept with trying to do the same thing. We don't think the IMAX bar has ever done so much trade with the staff looking horrified at how many double jack and cokes one audience can squeeze in... Observations? The audience was split into three. The clubbers who drank the bar dry and took lots of drinks in, a whole array of tubbier geeky gays we'd never seen out and who took more rubbish food into the screening than we'd seen anywhere ever and lastly, some confused straight people. Oh, and one child.

DD REVIEW: FAMOUS, FITLADZ, HUSTLABALL

Team damaged went out on Sunday in serious investigation mode. We visited Famous (good production but not enough punters), Fitladz and Hustlaball (fabulous except the exit.) Read on for more details.

BROMPTONS RETURNS AS INFINITY FRIDAY

Bromptons is to reopen as "Infinity" and will remain gay and open "day and night".  It's grand relaunch is tomorrow night, Friday 1st May.  It's great news for Earlcourtinites who have been without anywhere to go except Ted's and the cemetery without spending Oyster points. Read on for the comments and reviews of the opening night.

LA CAGE AUX FOLLES

Here at Damaged we've never really been into specifically gay focussed  plays, gay books or that kind of stuff: always the same shit. Now a gay club, that's different: same shit but… interactive. Anyways, you  can imagine our quelle horror when we were told we were taking two guests to the theatre to see the antithesis of gay theatre, La Cage aux Folle… at some theatre nobody's ever heard of as soon we could leave the house after New Year - we'd scheduled March but nope, it had to be this week:(